Well this is a new one…..We have a $.69 energy drink. Finally, Energy drinks are getting affordable….close to the price of something you would possibly buy in 12 packs and keep around as standard additions to your fridge. The problem we have here though is that you get what you pay for. Panther is quite simply Red Bull uncarbonated. While that does not sound too terrible, I must warn you…it actually is. The drink just tastes flat and metallic…not at all smooth. Kind of makes you feel like you are downing something that has been sitting on the shelves expired for a few months. While the taste itself is not overly offensive like a few other products we have tried, it definitely is not worth picking up unless you are REALLY desperate for an energy drink and you have damn near no money. The strange metallic taste in Panther totally turns me off. You know that feeling you get if you bite down on aluminum foil with a filling? That’s all that I can keep thinking about when I drink this stuff, and it freakin creeps me out.
Power wise Panther is ok….below average for sure, but for someone who is not a die hard energy drinker you’d probably be feeling pretty good after downing a can (or more to the point, after downing a can, and getting over the taste.) I definitely feel more awake than I did, but I’m not sitting where I’d prefer to be after a normal early morning drink. Over all I’d have to say this is just a sub par drink….could be decent if it was carbonated…but then again if it was carbonated it would just be Red Bull.
Porn Star Soda (Cola)
Porn Star Soda is kind of a stretch Energy sugar free for me here. It’s not technically an energy drink I don’t believe, but it is made by the folks at XTZ and they have a pretty good history of putting out solid stuff. Basically it’s just cola…the usual stuff, sugar and caffeine. Taste wise it’s pretty decent. Kind of reminds me of good old RC Cola really….not to strong, not to sweet…just about right actually. The kicker comes from the bottle. Each bottle of Porn Star Soda has a picture of a porn star on it…doing what porn stars do (The bottle I have has a label featuring none other than Miss Briana Banks on her knees doing what she probably does best). While Sum Poosie kind of hit the edge of “Sex sells”, Porn Star Soda when all out. The thought that “nothing says cola like a good snapshot of oral sex” might not be totally accurate, but by damn nothing SELLS cola like a good snapshot of oral sex. Now obviously there is a pretty basic novelty factor involved in this drink…it’s not something you are going to find in a six pack at the local grocery store (Actually it kind of gives me the creeps to think about a grocery store that WOULD have a six pack of this stuff on the shelves), but I could almost guarantee you that had this stuff been out when I was in college every guy I know would have given up Coke and Pepsi and had fridges full of Porn Star Soda in it’s place.
Really there is not much else I can say. I still have two other flavors to try (Berry and Citrus) that might be a little more exciting flavor wise, but as it sits this stuff is more for what’s on the bottle than what is in the bottle.